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Republicans

HowmanyRepublicansdoesittaketoscrewinalightbulb?
A:Two-onetodoitandonetosteadythechandelier.
A:None,theyonlyscrewthepoor


Q:HowmanyRepublicanPresidentialcandidatesfrom1988didittaketochangealightbulb?
A:(Dole)WhenIwasapoorboygrowingupinKansaswedidn'thavelightbulbs.NowIhavethehousekeeperdoit.



A:(DuPont)Lightbulbsneedtobechanged?Gosh.Iguesstheservantshavealwaystakencareofthat...WithaDuPontadministration,thepowerofthefreemarketwillbeunleashedtoproducelightbulbsthatneverneedchanging.
A:(Robertson)Oh,Lord,withthydivineillumination,healthislightbulb!
A:(Kemp)It'smorninginAmerica!Whyshouldweworryaboutlightbulbs?Let
thosedoom-cryingDemocratsworryaboutlightbulbs![stumbleoverchairinthedark].
A:(Haig)One.Snaptoit,soldier!
A:(Bush)None.(Bushinanearnestlapdogvoice)Iresentthatquestion.I'veanswereditbefore,andIthinkthemediaarekeepingthisthingalive.IthinktheAmericanpeopleareTIREDoflightbulbjokes.

Q:HowmanyaidesdoesittaketochangePresidentReagan'slightbulb?
A:None,theyliketokeephiminthedark.
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